


Kara, just Kara

by Delamour



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Feel-good, Feels, Gen, Magic, Normal Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 05:03:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9107722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delamour/pseuds/Delamour
Summary: Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it.





	1. Prelude - Somewhere Else

“Donna. The time has come to restore what was taken from you. To set you free. Find me and I will release you. I am Alchemy.”

Donne wakes with a start, drenched in sweat and heart galloping. It’s the third night in a row with the same nightmare. And now she’s remembering things. Things that can’t be true. She’s just a lawyer, not …

She stumbles into the bathroom and looks at herself in the mirror. The stranger looking back is tired and disheveled, no surprise after three days of broken sleep. Why did she not expect to see a blonde? Why does she feel that she can see madness in the eyes? She starts the shower and as soon as the water is warm, she lets it engulf her.

She opens her eyes again and gasps. Must have dozed off with her head on the shower wall.  
The shower stall is filled with steam, billowing over the edge like the snakes of Medusa. She was dreaming something ... something important … but it’s gone now.

She calls in sick. Sits for hours with a cup of cold coffee, just looking at clouds blowing past. Every now and then she sees something in a cloud, just can’t say _what_. Like a word stuck on the tip of her tongue. An idea that dare not be thought.

Then she walks around her apartment in a daze. Looks at the fake Greek vase she bought … when … she can’t remember. The framed reproductions of classical paintings of Greek heroes and villains. A leather bound edition of Homer’s Odyssey. A terracotta mortar and pestle. She’s had these things for years, why do they suddenly feel so _significant_.

In a moment of inspiration she throws on a coat, grabs her purse, and heads out. It’s raining. Of course it’s raining. The cold rain hits her forehead like drumsticks and she welcomes the biting cold and the wincing pain. It pierces the mindfog and gives her purpose. When she reaches the Central City Museum, she’s walking with brisk and determined steps. Whatever she’s looking for, this is where it is.

Few visit the museum in the middle of the day, but she feels like people are scattering before her as she walks in a direct line towards the classical exhibit. She stops at a statue of Hecate, goddess of magic. Donna Milton kneels almost instinctively … and remembers. Everything.

* * *

She lies in her bed, biding time, then she enters the sleep world and waits for Alchemy. He does not disappoint. She can see images that are intended to scare her, and his voice telling her to come to him. She grabs his soul into her dream and lets it dangle before her visage.

“Even Morpheus knows better than daring to invade the mind of a goddess. Who are you, mortal, and why should Circe let you live through the night?”

She lets him live. He’s a nobody, serving a nobody calling himself the God of Speed. That could only sound impressive to someone who has never met Hermes himself. She does owe the nobody a small gratitude for awakening her memories, so he gets to leave with both life and sanity intact, although with no memory of her. The tales he told, of heroes and villains, are intriguing. She needs to know more.

* * *

Circe is watching the world through her magical mirror. Alchemy had talked about this Flash as if he was the biggest hero of them all, and she has enjoyed watching him squirm. She has seen no sign of her old enemy, as if she has never existed on this world. It doesn’t make sense until she witnesses the Flash and his cohort breach the veil and enter a different world. That is it, she’s not where she should be, she was lost among worlds as well as in her own mind. Easily matching technology with magic, she follows the Flash to that other world.

* * *

She watches the new world patiently, waiting for the wondrous flying woman to come back. She did not look like her old enemy, but still there was something familiar about her, and this world has no other heroine that compares to the woman with the “S” symbol. 

Kara steps out of the wormhole and into her own apartment. _What a trip!_  She can’t wait to tell Alex all about it. 

_Hey, what day is it today … where’s my phone?_ She puts the wormhole-communicator...thing down and picks up her phone. _Good thing I remembered to turn it off. Why does it boot so slooooowly?!? Come on, phone!_

At the DEO, Winn gets an alarm and starts waving his arms frantically. “She’s back! Supergirl’s phone just went online!” Alex runs to his desk. “Where is she? Do you have a visual?”

Winn starts typing. “It’s her mobile, which was left at her apartment. Getting visual .... now.”

A window pops up showing Kara’s living room, with Kara standing there looking at her phone.

_Three days! Alex is probably worried sick by now. I better tell her I’m back. Hey, maybe there’s still Thanksgiving left-overs in the fridge. First Alex, then snack!_

Kara is just about to thumb the speed-dial for Alex when she hears a voice behind her, speaking in a language she doesn’t understand. She spins around faster than humanly possible and takes off her glasses in one fluid movement, ready for combat. In front of her stands a beautiful woman with long raven-black hair and a flowing green gown. The woman carries an air of authority and an almost perceptible aura of power.

“Who are you?” Kara demands. “What are you doing here?” She takes a threatening step towards the woman who points a single finger back … and Kara stops, her body refusing to move.

Alex is already running. “I’m going over there! Keep recording!”

Circe keeps a single finger pointing at Kara, twisting it slightly. “You are truly a wondrous woman, but not the one I’m looking for. No daughter of Themyscira would be stopped by such a simple spell. Let me see …. Maybe you know something …” She walks up to Kara and places two fingers on Kara’s forehead, smiling at the panic in the blonde’s eyes. Kara winces as a sharp pain goes through her head. “No, nothing! Shame. Well, then the least I can do is to grant you a wish.” Kara can feel memories running through her head, memories from her childhood on Earth, her happy times, her frustrations, memories of rescuing and helping people.

“Silly girl – you want to both be normal and to be exceptional at the same time. Mortals always want the impossible. Let me solve that little problem for you.” Circe hooks her fingers and pulls them back with a quick movement. Kara feels something snapping, then everything becomes black. 

Winn watches the green-clad woman make a simple gesture, then step through a shimmering in the air and disappear. “Alex, we have a problem.”


	2. Kara, just Kara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The DEO is on the case. All they need is ... any clue what's going on.

Alex is driving her motorcycle as fast as possible, National City Traffic Ordinance – and her own safety – be damned. She has run two red lights and is about to run the third. “Update, Winn!” she demands, again.

“Coming! I’m typing as fast as I can … here it is.” He brings up the video from before the phone was turned on. “Kara stepped out of a whirly vortex, like the one at Thanksgiving, seconds before she turned her phone on. She put something on the table, something shiny, … I can’t see what. Then the other woman appeared out of thin air.”

“OK.” Alex answers curtly, then brings her motorbike to an abrupt stop on the sidewalk outside Kara’s apartment and storms up the stairs. She stops at the door. “Door is untouched, tamper detection still in place. Update?” Winn answers in the negative, so she kicks the door in. She has a key for her sister’s apartment, but it’s in her locker with her civilian clothes, and now is not a time for finesse. Kara is still on the floor where she fell.

Alex lets her first aid training take over. “Pulse is strong … she’s breathing … eyes not dilated … no visible injuries. She looks fine!” She props Kara up against the couch and holds her hands. “Winn …!” she starts. 

Winn tries to sound calm. “Med-evac is on the way, but even with sirens and lights, they can only go so fast. I also called off the police, someone was driving very recklessly.”

Kara moans and starts to move. Alex grabs her hands even firmer. “Easy, Kara, I’m here.”

“A..Alex? What happened? Did I faint?” Kara looks at Alex, squinting. “Where are my glasses?”

“Your glasses?”

“Yes, Alex, you know I can’t see anything without my glasses!” Kara starts feeling the floor around her, so Alex finds the glasses where Kara had fallen and hands them over.

“Phew. I hate not being able to see! Oh, Alex, what happened to my door? Was it a burglar?”

Alex’s mind is working on overdrive. Something’s wrong, so there are two approaches – challenge it or play along to figure out more. Right now, she has nothing, so playing along seems the safer bet.

“We, … don’t know. It might have been a burglary, we are still investigating. Where have you been, Kara?”

“Been?” Kara looks perplexed.

“Yes, where have you been the last three days?”

“But Alex, you know I’ve been right here, in bed, being sick. You visited me every day and brought me food. I was so happy that I was finally well enough to go back to work, and now I’ve been … burglarized and assaulted?”

Alex pulls Kara in for a hug, stroking her head softly. “Don’t worry, we’ll figure out what’s happening. We’ll get you to medical and make sure you are OK.”

“Thanks Alex, it means a lot to me. Are you sure you won’t get in trouble for using FBI resources on a simple burglary?”

 _Play along, Alex, play along!_  “Quite sure. Nothing is more important to us than you.”

“Pfft, nah, that’s just something you’re saying. I’m just a wannabe reporter, not a big bad FBI agent like you!”

When the ambulance arrives, Kara is standing again, only a little uneasy on her legs. Alex instructs the paramedics to say as little as possible, and that she’ll be driving in the back with Kara. She evidence-bags the odd brooch Winn had described and follows them down.

* * *

At the DEO base, Kara is guided into the medical wing, with Alex following her all the way.

“I’m going to have our best doctor give you a full checkup, just to make sure nothing is wrong. Don’t worry, I’ll be right next door. Just switch to this hospital shirt and relax. Afterward we’ll see if you can remember something about what happened.”

Kara is clearly nervous and overwhelmed. She doesn’t recognize anybody or anything, but she does what Alex asks and gets ready. With a final hug, Alex sends her into the examination room. Then she swipes the dress and glasses and joins Winn and J’onn.

“It seems like some sort of amnesia.” Alex begins. “She thinks I work for the FBI, she doesn’t recognize anybody here, and she … doesn’t think she’s super. I don’t recognize this dress, so have it checked. Also this brooch. And the glasses, just to be sure, she claims she can’t see without them, so get them back quickly. Do we know what the woman in the video was saying?”

Winn shakes his head. “Not yet. We’re almost certain it’s some sort of ancient Greek, but our experience with that as a spoken language is, well, non-existent. Our own linguists are specialized in alien languages, but we are trying to get hold of some external experts.”

Two minutes later Winn comes back with the glasses. They are exactly like they have always been – lead-lined and with absolutely no correction. Alex sneaks them back in time for testing Kara’s eyes.

After half an hour, the examination is over, and Kara changes back into her own dress while Alex waits for her. “That’s a nice dress, Kara, where did you get it?”

Kara stops for a moment. “I … don’t remember. It was a gift, from someone rich. Must have been Lena. Probably the time she invited me to the gala. Yes, I think that was it. Do you like it?”

“Absolutely, it’s the perfect little black dress for a librarian!” Alex teases.

Kara ignores it, ties her hair back and gets up, looking positively perky now. “The doctor said I was perfectly fine, no sign of injuries or even a concussion. She took some blood too, but it didn’t hurt that much.”

Alex smiles and guides Kara into an interview room. “Have a seat, I’ll be right with you, then we’ll see if you remember something.” Then she closes the door gently and rushes into the examination room where Dr. Hamilton is waiting.

“I figured you would show up, agent Danvers, so here’s the short summary: Your sister is a perfectly healthy 25 year old _human_ female.”

“Human?”

“Yes. Just human. There is no sign of anything Kryptonian in her. I took a blood sample as the first thing and ran tests, and it’s completely different from when she burned out all her solar energy. Back then she was _like_  a human in power and vulnerability, but now she _is_  human. Her DNA is one hundred percent homo sapiens. She’s still a human in almost perfect condition, the only disability is that she believes herself to be short-sighted.”

“She believes …?”

“With her glasses she has perfect 20/20 vision, without them she’s severely myopic, and we both know that those glasses are no stronger than window panes.”

Alex hides her head in her hands. “So, you are saying that someone took the super out of my sister?”

“In a word, yes.”

“And will it come back?”

Emilia Hamilton puts a hand on Alex’s shoulder. “I don’t know, Alex. Nobody knows. If you had asked me yesterday, I’d have said that this couldn’t possibly happen at all. Even Medusa can’t make a change this thorough. So, to be positive, if the impossible is possible, then anything can happen.”

Alex questions Kara for about an hour and a half. She is extremely gentle, but still manages to get Kara talking about all the things that could be relevant. Kara is just amazed to see Alex at work, and seems to enjoy the experience, except that she is sorry she can’t help at all with figuring out who broke her door.

At the end, Alex finally drives Kara home and tells her to stay there for the rest of the day. The door has already been fixed, thanks to Winn, who has also had Alex’s motorcycle picked up. Then she goes back to the DEO for the first “whatever happened to Supergirl” crisis meeting.

* * *

Alex is the last to enter the briefing room, Winn, J’onn and Dr. Hamilton are already there. J’onn nods to her and begins. “Agent Schott, any progress on the woman-in-green?”

“I sent out the audio clip to any linguist or classical philologist willing to sign a non-disclosure agreement, and got back 27 different translations. Emphasis on _different_. It’s definitely some proto-greek language, but most of them put it waaaay back, around or before the time of Linear B.” Blank stares. “That’s about 3500 years ago, give or take. Anyway, I picked the words that there was most agreement on. Ahem …”

Winn picks up a print-out and reads. “Greeting sun female-or-maybe-sister. Myself predict you. You wonder female. Not myself search. No female .. something-maybe-a-name … stop simple magic. Understand. Not understand. Nothing. Bad. Desire grant. _Something_  female desire simple super and. Human useless. Myself resolve.” He looks up. “That’s it.”

“So, magic?” Alex pinpoints what everybody is thinking. “Is that possible?”

“Probably not, if it was possible, it wouldn’t be magic,” Winn says sarcastically, “but no, we have no record of anything that is classified as magic. We do have technology that is sufficiently advanced to _look_ like magic, but it’s _nothing_ like this. Not even shape changers can change their DNA completely.”

Alex sighs. She always hates not knowing what she is dealing with.

J’onn continues, “Dr. Hamilton?”

Dr. Hamilton starts by repeating what she told Alex earlier. “Also, I’ve now had time to complete the DNA sequencing. The DNA is completely _average_  human DNA. The thing that stands out is that _nothing_  stands out. It’s like each and every allele has been picked to be the most common one possible. That makes it impossible to determine any ancestry from DNA. Ditto for mitochondrial DNA. Anything that governs phenotype – that is, how she looks – is exactly right. Blue eyes, blonde hair, fair skin, average height, all encoded in the least surprising way possible. There are no recessive genes for any common genetic disease. And her blood is O Positive, the most common blood type. Her immune system forms antibodies for all the common colds and flus, just like everybody else. Physically she is, by any measure, the most average person in the world.” She smiles wryly. “That makes her quite unique.”

Alex tries to summarize “So, she’s an average human, but by no means a _normal_  human. We should still avoid anybody examining her too closely.” Everybody agrees. “And since she might need a doctor now, I’ll tell her that my FBI medical coverage extends to family and urge her to use us instead of anybody else. Winn, make a professionally looking emergency contact card for her.”

J’onn looks at Alex. “Agent Danvers, what _does_ she remember?”

Alex swallows. “Kara remembers everything about Kara, and nothing about Supergirl, nothing about Krypton, and almost nothing about aliens in general. The DEO is apparently all Supergirl to her, so she remembers nothing of it. I showed her pictures of the people she has worked with here, and the only three people she remembered was me, Agent Schott, who used to work at CatCo, and Mon-El, who she remembers as Mike, the intern. Her life before she arrived on Earth is completely gone, she believes the cover story we made is real. She was born in Argo, Alabama, her parents were John and Alura Sorell, that’s S - O - R - E - L - L, and they died in an accident when she was 13. Kara witnessed the accident, and the trauma caused amnesia, so she doesn’t remember that much about her childhood before that. She does know that Supergirl exists, because CatCo writes about her, but Kara has never met Supergirl in person. She remembers everything about growing up with us in Midvale, as long as it has nothing to do with her powers. I checked her reactions to familiar jokes, to tragic memories, and to happy memories. She really is Kara in every way, the only difference is that she’s _only_  Kara now.”

J’onn looks back to Winn. “What was it about the dress and the brooch?”

“The dress has a marker saying _Couture Étoile_ , basically French for _Star Fashion_. We found three tailors of that name, nearest one in Central City, but none of them recognize the dress. That’s hardly surprising, though, since this dress is literally other-earthly.” Winn pauses for dramatic effect, but quickly continues when Alex glares at him. “I mean, it’s not from this world. It’s from somewhere very-very similar to our Earth, but _slightly_  off. I did mass spectroscopy on a couple of samples.” He pulls up a graph with a lot of colored bars. “This is a sample from the cotton collar of the dress. Most is what you expect to see, but Cesium 134 is too high.” Winn points to a small bar. “Cs-134 is a long lived radioactive isotope that almost exclusively come from nuclear fission. There are trace amounts of it in the atmosphere from nuclear weapons testing and nuclear power plant accidents, and plants, like cotton, accumulate a little while growing. I had a forensic expert guarantee me that the cotton thread was made from U.S. grown cotton, but the Cs-134 amount in the cotton sample is far too high be for cotton grown anywhere in _this_  United States. So, alternate earth, one that has seen more nuclear fission than this one.”

“Atom bombs?” Dr. Hamilton sounds worried.

“Probably not, maybe just a world where Superman didn’t prevent the Wormwood reactor incident in Kasnia.”

“Alternate Earth, like the one that this … Barry Alan? … came from?” Alex asks.

“Barry Allen, yes. Which brings me to the brooch. It’s a device of some sort. Mostly human technology, but with a little alien tech embedded. I haven’t opened it, but scans show mostly off-the-rack components – except that they are not produced by any manufacturer I know. I got a little peek at the dimension-breaching-device Barry Allen was using back when he was here, and there are definite similarities in the designs. So, my best guess: It is a device given to Supergirl by someone on Barry-world, where she also got the dress. I have no idea what the device does. It’s also quite tamper-proof. Whoever designed it seems to be quite paranoid about the device being used by anyone but the intended owner – so right now, without Supergirl, nobody can use it.”

Alex shakes her head. “So, it’s a dead end – Kara went to this Barry-Earth, came back looking completely at ease, and was then attacked here. Nothing to suggest a connection, other than timing … and absolutely no leads.” She rubs her eyes for a moment, takes a deep breath, then looks back up. Why is it _never_ easy? “So, what do we _do_  now?”

The only answer is silence.

“OK, maybe we can’t do anything to _help_ Kara right now, but I’ll be damned if I’ll let anything _hurt_ her.” Alex sounds tired, but determined. “So, this is what we’ll do …”

They had already put surveillance on Kara’s phone and apartment when she was missing for 48 hours. Alex insisted on keeping it going, as long as only she could authorize access to see the footage. They also decided to add cameras at CatCo. If anything, or anyone, happened to Kara, they wanted to know immediately. Then they started listing all the new things that Kara would have to deal with like any other human, and ways they could help her. It was a short list, actually, after all Kara had been acting human for years before becoming Supergirl, so they didn’t think it could be that much. 

* * *

Kara was hungry, so she put a slice of frozen pizza in the microwave. She was a little confused at first because she couldn’t remember how she usually heated pizzas, but it had been a _really_  long day. It dinged, and she grabbed the plate, the pizza was looking and smelling delicious with bubbling cheese and pepperoni. She dropped down on the couch and took a bite.

 _Ow! Hot! Hot! Hot!_ She let the bite fall back on the plate and ran to the kitchen to find something cold to drink. After a while the pain receded. That _really_  hurt! It felt like the top of her mouth was in tatters. _Great day, just keeps getting better._  

* * *

“Oh!” Just as they were breaking up the meeting, a thought hit Winn, “We should probably tell the people who know that Kara is Supergirl, so they don’t act too surprised when she isn’t.” He starts counting on his fingers. “James Olsen, Lucy Lane, Clark Kent. And Superman too.”

Alex looks crestfallen. “And Mom! Oh God, what am I going to say to her?!?”


	3. Meeting Again for the First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Lena Luthor learns that she's not that different from Kara Danvers.

An age old adage says to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. By normal standards, Lena Luthor would be nailing that, seeing that her nearest family is also her worst enemies. But then, she was never close to her family. 

When Clark “Friend-of-Superman” Kent ambushed her on her way to the office, his attitude was immediately clear, and she didn’t bother trying to make friends. Just the facts, give him the data she had already prepared, and get him out. It took a moment before she even noticed he had someone “just tagging along”, so imagine her surprise when that someone, Kara Danvers, later came to warn her about appearing publicly until the assassin had been caught. Clearly Clark, or someone else, had trusted her with that information. So, she was _somebody_. And she seemed to genuinely care about Lena, which was honestly refreshing. Lena had decided to keep Kara close, at least until she knew more, always giving her the friendliest smile Lena could muster. And unless Kara was the best actor _ever_ , she was so transparent that it was actually a relief dealing with her – compared to the corporate scumbags and power-playing jetsetters that usually wasted Lena’s time. Then it turns out that the FBI agent protecting her from the assassin was Kara’s sister. And that Kara knows Supergirl, which is hardly surprising if she rubs elbows with both James Olsen and Clark Kent. There is more to that girl than meets the eye.

Six days ago, Kara had visited her and tried to … well, it’s not entirely clear what she was trying to do. Either she was there to tell Lena that her mother was up to something bad, or to not tell her and see if Lena knew about it, or something else in that direction, but it was so endearingly incompetent that she might as well have said it all directly. Someone had told Kara something, and Kara told her. She’d have to thank Kara the next time she saw her.

Alex Danvers had actually thanked Lena for her help in capturing her mother. Right before asking her if she had seen Supergirl, which was obviously much more pressing. Lena had to say no, she hadn’t seen Supergirl since she rushed off after the missile Lena had just launched. She didn’t add that Supergirl’s last words to her had been “Don’t do it, Lena!” after which she did indeed do just that. Sure, it worked out in the end, but the one thing that had followed Lena all her life, as consistently as the A+ grades, was the "doesn't play well with others" reports and scowling looks when she did things her own (and objectively superior) way. Lena wasn't surprised if even Supergirl was avoiding her after this latest scheme, but she didn’t think herself important enough for Supergirl to avoid the entire city over her.

Today Lena has worked sixteen hours straight, again, and she is running out of excuses to not go home when the intercom buzzes. “Ms. Kara Danvers to see you, mam.”

She rushes to open the door. “Jess! Why are you … You can leave us now. Please go home, Jess!” 

Lena leads Kara into her office. “I swear the woman is trying to guilt me into working less by staying just as late as me. But hello, Kara, to what do I owe the pleasure? And how did you know I was here?”

Kara smiles. “Well, I called Jess, she thought it would be a great idea if I visited.” Then she makes a grimace.

“Are you OK, Kara?”

“Yeah, fine. It’s just your building is so tall, my ears popped in the elevator. And my feet are _killing_  me. I probably shouldn’t have walked all the way here. I didn’t remember the trip as this long.”

“You sound different?” Lena leads Kara to the couch, only now noticing that Kara is limping more than walking.

“Ah, yes, I burned my mouth on pizza.”

“It’s been quite a day, I take it.”

“Oh yes. And then …” Kara sighs. “That’s not why I’m here! It’s not supposed to be about me!” She stops and looks at Lena, now much more serious. “I’m _so_  sorry that I lied to you and pretended I didn’t know anything about your mother. I did know that she was Cadmus, and I didn’t tell you.”

“It’s OK, I …” Lena starts, but Kara stops her. 

“It’s not OK. And I’m so sorry I’ve been sick, otherwise I’d been here days ago to say this. I trust you, Lena! You have proven again and again that everybody should trust you. And because I didn’t show that, you had to take down your mother by yourself. I can’t imagine how that must have felt.”

“Quite relieving actually.” Lena adds a chuckle. “After finding out that she really was a homicidal maniac …”, she doesn’t say the _“too”_ , but she can’t help thinking it, “… I was happy to see her locked up before anybody else got hurt. It’s not like she ever loved me, or I her.”

Lena thought that speech came over pretty well, she’d been preparing it for just such a question.

Kara just looks at her, now with tears in her eyes. “Oh, Lena. You don’t have to pretend it didn’t hurt. You don’t have to be sorry for locking her up, but it’s OK to feel sorry for _needing_  to. And even if she never did love you, and I believe you, now you have to face the fact that _she never will_.”

Lena opens her mouth to retort, … then she realizes that she has no words. She feels like someone hit her in the gut, her eyes are going moist. Over what? Kara just keeps looking at her with those kind and sad eyes.

“Lena, Lena, Lena … I’m sure your mother taught you not to cry, but that’s just one more way she mistreated you. Don’t let her ruin the rest of your life! It’s OK to cry for your loss.”

“… but … I didn’t lose …” Lena manages to stutter.

Kara puts her hands on Lena’s shoulders and looks her in the eyes. “You lost the hope of _having_  a mother, a _real_ mother. You lost a hope you must have carried since you were four. You must let four-year old Lena grieve for that loss, for the mother she never got to have. Let _her_ cry, Lena.”

And Lena cries like a four-year old. She feels Kara hug her and comfort her, and she lets it happen.

You can only cry for so long, and eventually Lena pulls back, sniffling and wiping her cheeks with a sleeve. “I-I’m sorry,” she says, “How … How did you know … twenty years of conditioning not to cry, and you walked right through it! How?”

Kara holds Lena’s hand and looks straight at her. “Lena Luthor, you are an amazing and extraordinary person, … but you are still human, and you should never forget or deny that. Every child wants their parents to love them. Every _adopted_  child fears that they won’t.”

“You say that … like it’s personal?“

Kara’s voice lowers and her eyes go distant. “I still remember that fear. I was thirteen when I was adopted, and even though Eliza was as loving and caring as anyone could hope for, it still took me years to accept it. I remember the fear – that she didn’t really love me, because I wasn’t good enough, because I was too much trouble, because she already had Alex, perfect Alex. The fear that I would lose her too, and the craving for her to love me.” She looks back at Lana. “And you, poor thing, has lived with that craving for decades, only to finally have it snatched away completely.”

Kara tilts her head slightly and sighs. “I knew what to say because it’s what I would have said to myself. Thirteen-year-old Kara is still part of me, all the feelings are still there. And sometimes I let her out and cry, so I can also comfort her and say that it _is_  better now.”

“Will it ever go away?” Lena asks quietly, as if she already knows the answer.

“Probably not completely. You can’t remove the pain, it is just as real as everything else. You have to fill the hole in your heart with something good instead.”

Lena stands up and walks to the balcony window, looking into the night. She sees her reflection in the window, her makeup is a mess. “I … I should go home. Would you mind coming along? I don’t want to be alone.”

“Of course, Lena. What kind of friend would I be if I left you alone now!” Kara smiles and gets up too. “Ouch! As long as we don’t have to walk there!”

They didn’t walk – Lena had an on-call chauffeur with a luxury limo – and Kara got her first look at Lena’s penthouse apartment. It was huge, but sparsely decorated, so they ended up on a couch facing a faux fireplace. Lena hadn’t eaten, so she ordered some food, “rich people’s takeout” as Kara named it, which was an amazing steak with roasted potatoes and crispy salad, and a far too expensive red wine. And they talked, ate, laughed, swapped stories of their childhoods, cried, and talked some more – two adopted orphans sharing their childhood hopes and fears – until Lena fell asleep. Kara had to rummage through two spare bedrooms to find some blankets, and she put one over Lena, and cuddled up in an extremely comfy armchair with another. Then she too fell asleep.

The next morning, they wake to an alarm clock ringing somewhere else in the house. Lena rushes to turn it off. “My housekeeper will be here in ten minutes to make breakfast. You can use the bathroom over there.” Then Lena runs into the master bedroom and Kara can hear a shower running. _Ten minutes, Lena sure doesn’t leave herself much time to wake up._

Kara takes a shower in the most luxurious shower stall she has ever seen, and she deeply regrets that there isn’t time to try to giant tub next to it. Then she dries herself off, puts on her – by now pretty wrinkled – dress and her glasses, and wraps her hair in another towel. Then she follows her nose to the breakfast table where Lena is eating an omelet and reading today’s papers.

“Kara! I’m so sorry for falling asleep on you. You didn’t have to stay here all night.”

Kara smiles. “I was happy to stay! If it was me, I’d have nightmares and I hate waking up alone after a nightmare.” She stretches and yawns. “And, I must say, that is the most comfortable chair I have ever slept in!”

They eat and talk about headlines until Lena has to leave for the office. “Can I drop you off at home? I don’t want you walking all that way again!”

Kara swallows the rest of her toast. “Mmn, no thanks. Your office is fine, it’s close to CatCo.”

“Are you sure? You might want a change of clothes, and I don’t think I have anything in your size.”

Kara smiles. “Don’t worry, I have more than one spare dress at CatCo. Being Cat Grant’s assistant was hard work, and you didn’t always get to go home at night, so I could practically live at the office for days when necessary.” She removes the towel and lets her hair out. “What?” Lena is looking at her oddly.

“Oh, nothing.” Lena says, “I just don’t think I have ever seen you with your hair out before.”

Kara runs her hands through her hair, lifting it up. “Yeah, I do prefer to wear it up, but it gets _completely_ unmanageable if I put it up while it’s still damp.”

They ride the limo to L-Corp towers, but most of the trip, Lena has to handle a phone call. She isn’t done when the car stops in the private garage, so Kara waits. Lena tries to wave at her to show that she can just go, but Kara steadfastly shakes her head. Finally Lena finishes the call.

“You didn’t have to wait, Kara.”

“Yes. Yes, I did. Because I need to say something to you, and you need to hear it.” She moves over to sit directly across from Lena. “You are an amazingly strong, brave and _good_  person. I am happy to be your friend, and if there is anything I can do for you, do not hesitate to call. Also, don’t forget that you are allowed to cry! Crying makes you stronger.”

“… does … what?” That idea is so far from anything Lena has ever been taught.

“Crying makes you stronger! When I came to ... to the Danvers family, I kept remembering my mother telling me to be brave. So I was brave and didn't cry. Jeremiah taught me that crying was good – that if you don’t cry, the pain just stays inside you and grows, it makes you brittle instead of strong. When you cry, you accept the pain and can learn to live with it," she pauses and looks up at Lena, "Your pain is real, and there is nothing wrong with it or you. The pain is part of you, just as much as everything else, but you mustn’t let it alone define you.” Kara puts her hand on Lena’s knee. “And if you need me, call!”

Lena pulls her into a hug. “Thank you Kara, for caring”, she whispers.

“Pfft. You deserve it.” They pull apart again. “Now, go Lena, and be a big, strong CEO. That is also you.”

Kara walks to the CatCo building, feeling exuberant. It’s like the sun is shining brighter today. She really thinks she has helped Lena, and if there is one thing Kara loves doing, it’s helping people. That’s when she remembers that Alex had told her to stay in the apartment, and that she turned her phone off before talking to Lena because she didn’t want to be interrupted. Well, she did leave a note for Alex, saying where she went. She turns her phone back on and it starts beeping repeatedly as a night’s worth of messages are finally delivered. _Oops._


	4. First Day of the Rest of Your Life

Kara looks at all the messages Alex has sent her, but decides that a few more minutes won’t make a difference. She hurries to her emergency lockers at CatCo – one of the perks of being a CEO’s assistant was that you could install extra lockers in an unused basement room without being questioned – and picks a dress for the day. She wants something bright and flashy, and ends up with a white dress with red polka dots and a red cardigan. She ties her hair back in a pony tail and applies a matching lip-stick. Excellent, nobody will be able to see that she never got home last night. Now she better call Alex and make sure she isn’t too upset.

Alex is upset. When Kara’s phone came back online, she immediately had Winn triangulate her location. “She’s near CatCo, moving towards the office from … the direction of L-Corp.”

After their meeting the night before, they noticed that Kara had left her apartment, and that her phone had been turned off somewhere near the L-Corp towers. “First chance, we put a tracking device in that phone that works even when the phone is off!” Alex did have a pang of regret about spying on her sister, but right now, keeping Kara safe was her first and only priority.

  
Alex had tried messaging Kara repeatedly through the night. She even had a drone with a telescopic camera look at Lena’s office, but it was empty at that point. Finally she fell asleep at her desk, and J’onn ordered her to go sleep in a bunk instead. She was up four hours later, looking at the monitor and waiting for a signal. So, yes, when Kara finally deigned to turn on her phone, Alex was pretty upset.

“Where have you been?!” Kara holds the phone away from her ear, Alex is practically shouting.

“Sorry about that, Alex, but I needed to talk to Lena. I didn’t expect to be gone this long, but I did leave a note!”

Alex looks at Winn, who shrugs. He quickly goes back over the surveillance feed from just before Kara left and lets it play where Alex can see it. Kara is doing something in the kitchen, but Alex can’t see what. It could be writing a note. 

She forces herself to relax. “I’m sorry, Kara, I didn’t see the note, and I was just really worried about you.” _Stupid, stupid, rookie mistake – with the surveillance they knew Kara wasn’t in the apartment, so she never went there, like she would have otherwise. That’s the kind of mistake that can blow an investigation._ “Where are you now?” … _because that’s what she would ask if she didn’t already know._

“I’m at work, at CatCo. Don’t worry, I’m fine. Well, so far. I’m going to have to explain to Snapper that I haven’t written anything in four days.”

Alex forces a smile. “Don’t worry, I hear he barks worse than he snaps!”

That makes Kara giggle. “Thanks, sis. See you later. Love you!”

“Love you too, Kara.”

That giggle finally let Alex relax. Kara is OK. “Winn?”

“Yes?”

“You know, those secret service guys that protect the president and her family …”

“Hm?”

“I really, really don’t envy them!”

…

“Did we tell James?”

Winn looks up. “Yes, I told him. He told Lucy and Clark. Then I had to tell Superman to not come flying immediately, but he’ll be here later today.”

“Oh, great. I messaged Eliza, she’ll probably be here too.” Alex stifles a yawn. “I’ll try to get some sleep. I promised Maggie to have lunch. Wake me if anything happens.”

* * *

Alex praises her luck – nothing did happen, and she got another two hours. That’s at least in the same ballpark as a night of sleep. When she gets to the diner, Maggie is standing outside, waiting.

Alex can feel butterflies in her body. Her science-brain feels the need to tell her that the symptoms of infatuation are remarkably close to those of oxygen deprivation. She stops and takes a deep breath. “How is my favorite detective doing today?”

Maggie smiles back. “She’s missing her favorite girlfriend, girlfriend!” Then she pulls Alex in for a long kiss. 

When she pulls back, Alex almost stumbles. Yep, it’s _definitely_ lack of oxygen. Dizziness, buzzing in the body, tunnel vision, inability to make a coherent thought.

“Shape up, Danvers, let’s get something to eat.” Maggie smacks Alex on the ass and leads her inside the diner. “One bacon BBQ burger with fries, Alice, and the usual for me.”  

Maggie sits down in a booth across from Alex and looks at her for five seconds without blinking. “What’s up, Alex. You’re worried about something, that much is clear. Is Supergirl still missing?”

Alex nods.

“And how is Kara?”

Alex’s eyes widen for a moment, then she relaxes. “Kara is fine. She’s been sick, but she’s better now. She’s back to work today.”

“And Supergirl is still missing?” Maggie tilts her head slightly.

Alex sighs. “How long have you known?”

“Oh, I had a hunch after seeing you and Supergirl together one or two times. You were too coordinated, too sure of each other, to just be colleagues, or at least colleague that hadn’t worked together for at least a decade, and it didn’t look romantic. It looked like family.”

“Really?” Alex sounds skeptical.

“Yes, really. If you had _actually_  gone to Quantico, you’d have learned behavioral analysis too. Of course, I wasn’t absolutely sure until the time Kara drank Aldebaran rum …”

Alex groans. “I’m _so_ going to kill Mon-El.”

“Don’t worry, I don’t think anybody else in the bar knew who Kara was, and the guy ... Mon-El? ... was hogging the all the attention.”

“That’s what you get for dating a detective.” Alex puts her hand on top of Maggie’s and squeezes it. “And yes, Kara is fine and Supergirl is missing … It’s … Kara has lost her powers and her memory of being Supergirl. I … don’t know what to do.”

Maggie moves to sits next to Alex and puts an arm around her shoulders.

“I’m so sorry, Alex. But Kara is OK?”

“She’s fine, every bit the Kara I know, just … only that.”

“Then that is what you should focus on.” Maggie turns Alex’s head and looks her in the eyes. “Your sister is safe. That’s the most important thing. The rest is something you … something _we_  can deal with.”

Alex buries her head in the nook of Maggie’s neck and just whispers “Thanks!” 

She stays there until the food arrives. “OK, Danvers. Let’s eat, and then you can tell me everything that’s happened.”

…

One delicious burger later, Maggie is up to speed. “So, in short, the perp is an ancient Greek sorceress with no priors, and the vic doesn’t know she lost anything. Tough case!”

Alex smiles, “Yeah, that just about sums it up.”

“Unless …”, Maggie continues, “… she really _is_  a mythical Greek sorceress. I do crosswords, and _greek sorceress_  is always either Circe or Medea, so that narrows the suspect pool. Maybe there is something about the M.O. that can tell us more.”

“Are you saying that actual gods are roaming the world?” Alex raises an eyebrow.

“When you have ruled out everything else, …”

“Thanks, Sherlock! I _wish_  we could rule _anything_  out. But hey, it’s a lead, which is better than the nothing we have so far.”

* * *

When Alex returns to the DEO, Superman is already there. So is Eliza, who rushes to meet Alex with a hug. Alex can see her mother has been crying, so she hugs her back and whispers “Easy, mom, easy. Kara is still here.”

“I know … “, Eliza takes a step back, “I just thought … what if she had only remembered being Supergirl instead, … then I _would_ have lost her!”

Alex can feel a knot in her stomach just from thinking the thought. Maggie was right, her _sister_  is still here. Losing the super is the smaller loss, maybe not to the world, but definitely to her. And their mother. And all Kara’s friends. Right then and there, Alex realizes that even if Kara never gets her powers or memory back, it’ll still be OK.

“Kal? How do you feel about this?” Alex turns to Superman.

“Kara was really the last Kryptonian. I was just born there, but she was raised and lived as a Kryptonian for half of her life. It pains me to see that legacy lost.” Superman grimaces. “But, if I was the one to choose, I would still prefer her as a happy human with friends and family, rather than as a lonely Kryptonian. Forgetting Krypton is a tragedy. Forgetting the half of her life that she has had here on Earth, that would be a crime!”

Alex puts a hand on Superman’s arm. “Way with words, big guy. Thanks!” Then she is back to business. “OK, are you two up to speed?”

Both Eliza and Superman nods, Winn has shown them everything already.

“Then you know that we don’t know _anything_. Any ideas you have, no matter how ridiculous, is an improvement. Winn, have a lab be ready for Eliza whenever she wants it. Kal, just say if there is anything we can do. Oh, and Maggie had an idea – try reading up on Circe and Medea and see if something matches our sorceress.”

“You told Maggie?” Winn asks, a hint of disapproval in his voice.

“More like she told me. Apparently, we never fooled her anyway. Did I mention that she’s quite the detective.”

“Yes, you did. Repeatedly.” Winn puts on his thinking expression. ”OK, if we are looking at Greek mythos, it would be Circe. Medea is more of an enchantress, while Circe transmuted Odysseus’ men to swine. What? You never read the Odyssey? Anyway, Circe is the daughter of … oh. OH!” He starts typing very quickly, pulling up documents. “Yes! Remember the translation, it started with something like _sun_ and _female_  or _sister_. I just remembered one of the translations, _this one_ ,” - he taps his screen vigorously - “number 14, was using the phrase _fellow daughter of the sun_  … and Circe was the daughter of Helios, the god of the sun. It doesn’t _completely_ rule out Medea, who was a grand-daughter of Helios, but still!”

“So maybe our perp _does_ have priors.” Alex smiles – because Maggie! “Find out everything you can on this Circe and her magic.”

* * *

Kara is struggling as a reporter. She knows exactly what to write, but typing is _so slow_. How did she manage years of being a P.A. without touch typing? The day is almost over and she still has half a column to write. She’ll have to finish this at home tonight. 

Also, James has been acting weird. He keeps coming over and checking up on her, asking her if everything is OK. 

* * *

It’s twilight and Kara is on her way home, on a bus, when Alex calls her. “Hi Alex. All well in law enforcement?”

“Super!” Alex winces, that phrase just doesn’t feel right today. “Eliza is in town, how about I buy dinner and we meet at your place?”

“Hmmm, OK. I have some work to do tonight, but dinner should be fine! Six-ish?”

“Sounds great. See you then!”

Alex hangs up and turns to Eliza. “Six o’clock. And remember, just act naturally. You are just in town for something else, not because of her.” Eliza nods unconvincingly.

Kara is just about done cleaning up her living room, and that took _much_ longer than she expected, when the doorbell rings. She puts away the vacuum and rushes to open the door, feeling hot and slightly sweaty.

Alex waltzes in swinging with bags of food, “Hope you are in the mood for Chinese!”, drops them on the table and continues to the kitchen.

Eliza is hardly through the door before she captures Kara in a tight hug.

“Uhm, what’s up, Eliza. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but you don’t usually …”

“Hug you?”

“Sure, but not _before_ taking off your coat!”

“Oh… I’m just happy you’re safe, Kara. I heard about the … burglary, and I realized how much it means to me that you are sound and safe.”

“Aww. I love you too, Eliza.”

When they finally let go, Kara points a thumb to the kitchen. “You shouldn’t worry, though, when I’ve got Supergirl Mc-FBI-face there protecting me.”

“Mc. What-what?” Alex stops stacking plates. “ _What_ did you call me?”

“Come on, Alex. We all know you’re the Supergirl of this family, big super-agent you!” Kara hangs up Eliza’s coat and closes the door. She continues, just to Eliza, “You should have seen her yesterday, she was here when I woke up. I’m sure she flew to get here so fast!” Kara looks thoughtful for a moment. “Hey Alex! How did you know I needed help?”

Alex comes back into the living room, balancing plates and drinks, and luckily doesn’t flinch. This question she has prepared for. “You dialed me, remember. I heard the crash, and I happened to be nearby.”

“I did? Hmm, that is true, the last thing I remember was that I was just about to call you. To tell you that I was feeling well again.” Kara looks relieved. “That was a good call! I mean, calling the cops before you get in trouble!” She chuckles. “And you are sure you didn’t fly here?”

“Absolutely sure.” Well, some videos of her wild ride have shown up online, and _flying_  is a common word in the comments. So are _stunt_  and _reckless_. Alex isn’t sure whether to be proud or embarrassed, but she’ll definitely never tell Kara about it – or Eliza! “So, how was work today, Kara?”

They manage to talk about non-super-related things for the rest of dinner. Alex has to admit to herself that it actually feels _nice_ to talk about normal stuff with her family. She even mentions that she met Maggie for lunch, and it’s all about that, and not whatever aliens Maggie might be chasing. At the end of the meal, she’s genuinely smiling.

“Whoa, I literally cannot eat another potsticker! And I want to!” Kara leans back with her hands on her stomach. “You bought way too much food, Alex!”

“Didn’t want to run out. You can keep the left-overs.” She had bought less than half of what she normally would, but she realized that she didn’t know how much human-Kara could, or would, eat.

“Well, success then!” Kara stands up carefully. “Feel free to stay here, but I have some typing to do. And probably some setting up – IT support at CatCo is really unimpressive since you feds stole our IT guy.”

“We bought him fair and square! Which reminds me, I found out that FBI health insurance covers family too, so if you need a doctor, just call this number.” She hands over a very authentic looking plastic card with Kara’s name embossed on it, Winn outdid himself on this one. “Or even new glasses. Doctor Hamilton mentioned you might want to get those eyes checked again, she’s just a doctor, not an optometrist.”

“Oh, Alex, you didn’t have to! We do have medical at CatCo.”

“Actually I did have to, otherwise I would be in trouble for using FBI doctor time on you already. But we have the best doctors, and nothing less will do for you, sis!”

Alex and Eliza did stay, and eventually found themselves in the kitchen sharing a bottle of red wine. Kara was typing away at the computer in her bedroom. Eliza whispers “She looks happy.” Alex agrees. “I’ll just have to make sure she stays that way.” She smiles wryly. “At least, she can’t hear us whispering.”


	5. The Days they are A-passing

It’s amazing how soon the extraordinary becomes normal, especially when the extraordinary _is_  being normal. Within a week, Alex has stopped panicking over Kara. She’s still an open case at the DEO, but not as urgent as all the other active cases that they now have to handle without Supergirl.

Media coverage of Supergirl’s absence dies down after the first week or so, and they started almost as soon as Kara left for Barry-earth. The occasional “sighting” stops being front page news. 

Kara, of all people, writes a beautiful piece about how Supergirl made people remember to have hope, and wherever she is now, we all wish the best for the people she is now helping.

_“I showed a draft to James, and I swear I saw him crying!” Kara confided to Alex._

Alex dutifully fills in the “Kara Log” whenever something comes up that might be important to the case.

_Day 3. Shopping for glasses._

Alex convinced Kara that she should get new glasses, just because she could, and they would look awesome. They spent a morning getting Kara’s eyes measured - to exactly what Dr. Hamilton had said – and picking out frames. Kara ended up picking something that looked remarkably like her existing glasses, and another frame in red and gold. She was so disappointed that she had to wait a week for the glasses to be made to prescription. 

Alex made absolutely sure nobody got a good look at Kara’s old glasses.

Afterward they celebrated at Noonan’s with a _Kara Special_  – a banana split with three types of ice cream and candied black cherries on top.

_Day 5. Kara met the Alura hologram._

Alex comes around to Kara’s apartment with a fancy alien gizmo they have found - a holographic projector. She just wants Kara to see it. It’s a blue lady. She speaks a language that Kara doesn’t understand, but Alex translates it as something like “How can I help you?” 

Something about her makes Kara sad. It finally clicks - “You know, Alex, that woman looks kindof like my mother, Alura. It’s not exactly her, but it does remind me of her.”

“It does?”

“Yes. I don’t think my mother was this pretty, but still, there is something about her face. Could you … please turn it off.”

Alex rushes to turn off the device and then comforts Kara for a while.

“I’m sorry, Kara. I didn’t mean to make you sad!”

“Don’t worry, there’s no way you could have know that!”

So Alex feels like a jerk. She logs that experiment as a complete failure – the hologram didn’t recognize Kara and Kara didn’t really recognize the hologram or Kryptonese at all.

_Day 6. Convinced Kara not to buy a bicycle._

“But Alex, it’s so much easier to get around. No traffic jams, no waiting for busses. I know I haven’t ridden one since Midvale, but I’m sure I remember how.”

“Kara, have you seen how many people ride bicycles downtown?”

“… not a lot?”

“Nobody, because traffic will _literally_  kill you if you try. Works great in Midvale, not great in downtown NC.”

When Kara begins to pout, Alex puts an arm around her. “Hey, it’s a great idea, this city just isn’t ready for it yet!” And she thinks that she’d miss the freedom of flying too.

_Day 7._

Status meeting at the DEO. Superman and Eliza are as stumped as everybody else. It’s a very short meeting.

Kara had dinner with Lena Luthor. She wouldn’t say what they talked about.

_Day 8._

Alex handed Kara an energy drink. “Try this. I want to know what you think.”

Kara takes a big mouthful, looks odd, swallows it and winces. “That’s _awful!_  Tastes like … eating grass, or something.”

“OK, so it’s not just me. Thanks.”

Alex logs that as a failure – the concoction contained Snowdrop, which is considered to be the “Moly” plant that protected Odysseus from Circe’s magic. It was really a long shot, but it’s not like they have anything better.

_Day 9. Kara met Maggie Sawyer for the first time._

Alex and Maggie have decided to invite Kara to lunch. Technically, Kara has never met Maggie, only Supergirl has, so they aren’t sure how much she’ll know. Maggie is ready to tell all about her work, but it turns out that Kara is much more interested in Maggie’s family and where she comes from. Afterward Maggie gives Alex a kiss on the cheek before leaving the Danvers sisters alone.

“So, what do you think?” Alex asks expectantly.

“Hmm …” Kara looks unconvinced … until she breaks out in a smile. “Kidding, I like her! She’s smart and nice, I bet she’s tough too, and she obviously has good taste! I’m glad she finally came around to seeing how irresistible you are!”

“Thanks, Kara. That means a lot to me.”

It wasn’t until later that Alex remembered that this had also been about Kara, so she logged it as another failure. Kara remembered nothing of Maggie meeting Supergirl.

_Day 10. Kara got her new glasses._

The new glasses are finally done, and Kara acts as if it is her birthday. She insists on wearing the red-gold pair for the rest of the day, even though they were ostensibly only for “festive occasions”, but as she argues “I just got new glasses! That’s a festive occasion!” 

Alex suggests that she'll keep the old glasses at her apartment, in case Kara ever needs a spare. That was the real reason for getting Kara new glasses, now the magical glasses are no longer at risk of discovery.

_Day 12. Game night._

Completely uneventful when Winn and James finally manage to relax. Apparently getting “Superman” in Pictionary is too much for them. Danvers sisters kick their ass.

_Day 14. 5:07 AM._

_Alex is flying through the night sky, looking for something. She can’t find it. She looks under the bed. In the kitchen. Where is Maggie? Why is the fire alarm ringing?_  She wakes with a start. _Fire … alarm … what? No .. it’s the alarm clock._  She presses the alarm clock until she realizes nothing happens. _No … the phone_. She fumbles for her phone. “Alex Danvers.” _Man, that voice sounded grating._

“Hi Alex, it’s Kara. Sorry to wake you up, but I’m bleeding.”

“What? What happened? Are you hurt?” Alex is suddenly wide awake.

“No, no, I’m fine. Don’t worry. It’s just, you know, that time of the month, and I’m all out of … well, _everything_! Could I get you to come by with some things for me on your way to work?”

 _Doh!_  “Sure Kara, I’ll get you everything you need.”

“Thanks! I don’t really want to go anywhere like this. It hurts too.”

“Just relax and take two Advil …”, _and of course she won’t have painkillers either_ , “… I’ll bring those over as well, first thing!”

When she logs that incident, Winn unhelpfully re-mails her the “0 days since we forgot what it means to be human” meme. They had always assumed her body just handled everything without bleeding, but when she was 15, they had faked it a couple of times to avoid suspicion from the other girls at school. Kara read everything she could – it was really when her _I-want-to-be-normal_  phase topped – so she knows the theory. Well, now she's stocked up on everything a normal person’s medical cabinet needs, including painkillers, pads and band-aids.

At least she always brushed her teeth. Alex grimaces at the thought of what Kryptonian mouth bacteria could do, and no dentist drill on Earth could do anything about it. Having to guess at what could possibly hurt Kara isn’t new.

That night, Kara has dinner with Lena again in what was to become a weekly event where Lena brings, or cooks, magnificent food, and they just talk about whatever is on their minds. Sometimes, when Lena talks about her childhood, they both end up crying, but mostly, Lena is just amazed by Kara’s ability to talk about anything. She has a feeling that everybody, Kara herself included, severely underestimates just how smart Kara _really_  is. It’s like she’s been holding herself back.

_Day 17. Kara has taught herself touch typing._

She still doesn’t think it’s fast enough, though. Nothing beats super-speed hunt-and-peck typing.

_Day 20. Kara is learning French._

“If I want to be a real reporter, I should be able to talk to all possible sources, and read foreign newspapers.” Kara explains. “It’s an online self-study, so I can do it when I have time.”

“But why French?”, Alex asks while taking another pizza slice.

“They speak French in Canada. And France.” And she heard Lena speak French, it sounded amazing.

_Day 27. Christmas eve._

Both Kara and Alex are home in Midvale for Christmas, for the first time in years. Kara talks all evening about her new assignment. She’s doing an article about charities and volunteer work in National City, and it’s clear that she is thinking about it a lot. Everybody has a nice time.

_Day 28. Christmas day._

Alex had forgotten how calming the sound of the ocean is to her, she hasn’t slept that well in ages.

Eventually, Kara can’t wait any longer, and she wakes Alex by yelling “BREAKFAST! AND PRESENTS!” 

Alex wraps herself in a bathrobe and shuffles downstairs. Kara is ecstatic, Eliza is in her own bathrobe, yawning and pouring coffee into two mugs. She hands one to Alex. “Some things never change.”

Kara is standing at the Christmas tree, in her favorite Christmas sweater and her festive glasses, with a huge gift that she can’t wait to give away.

Alex nods in agreement. “That’s just so … Kara.”

  


Later Kara and Alex are driving back to National City. Alex is spending the rest of the day with Maggie, and Kara is meeting Winn and Mike for lunch, and Lena Luthor for dinner, because _“nobody should be alone on Christmas!”_

“So, what are you giving Lena? You know, the woman who has, or can buy, everything.”

“Yeah, she insisted that just seeing me was gift enough, since I am _still_  her only friend in NC – and she doesn’t sound like she left a lot of them in Metropolis either. She really should get a hobby, you know. Anyway, I painted a portrait of her.” Kara smiles widely. “I think it is pretty good!”

Alex raises an eyebrow. “As I remember it, there are plenty of paintings of her at the office.”

“And have you seen them?” Kara sounds almost incensed. “They all look so regal and powerful, and I’m sure they are great at intimidating people she negotiates with, but I want her to remember that she’s also a person, not just a CEO. I painted her kind and smiling, from memory, so you could say it’s really my impression of Lena. I want her to remember that there are people seeing her like that too.”

“You really put a lot of thought into this. She better like it!” Alex puts a hand on Kara’s shoulder and looks at her. “And I’m glad you are painting again, it always made you so happy.”

“Eyes on the road! But thanks. I don’t even know why I stopped … I just never found the time.” She pats her bag of gifts. “And thanks again for the new keyboard, I hope that layout really is faster than what I have now.”

  


Lena loved the painting. Kara admitted that it took her a whole weekend to find the right shade of green for the eyes.

_Day 33._

“Kara,” Alex sounds concerned, so Kara looks at her, “Are you putting on weight?”

Kara swallows the rest of her potsticker. “Pfft! Nooo. Why would you think that?”

“Because I have eyes? Let me check you! Do you have a scale?”

Turns out Kara has put on 12 pounds in one month. “OK, sis, this needs to stop. Either we’re cutting down on the potstickers or you start exercising!”

“That’s not fair, you eat the same things I do!”

“I do, but I also have a strict physical regimen and an action packed job. You can’t eat like that and sit behind a desk all day. Exercise starts tomorrow!”

Kara tries pouting, but Alex isn’t budging on this one. “It’s for your own good. It’s great that you’ve been able to keep your teenage body into your twenties, but now time has caught up with you, and you’ll actually have to _work_ to keep in shape like the rest of us. You know, you always tell people that you work out?”

“Yeah, we both know I lie about that.”

“Great news, you won’t have to lie anymore!”

Kara throws a pillow in Alex’s face.

_Day 34._

Kara did her first exercise session today. She hates it.

Winn has invited everybody over for New Year’s eve. He creates an amazing fireworks show, the colors favoring blue, red and gold. Kara is just a bit tipsy from the champagne, and she thinks he did it to match her blue dress and red-and-gold glasses. Kara had insisted that Lena be invited too, and she thanked for the invite, but declined politely.

The fireworks from L-Corp tower are pretty amazing too, ending with two emerald green explosions hanging in the night sky. That’s when Kara receives a text from Lena - “Thanks again, loved the color!”

_Day 35._

Exercise – she still hates it.

_Day 36._

Apparently Lena Luthor said something to Kara last night that made her change her opinion. She still doesn’t _like_  exercising, but she’s doing it anyway without complaining. All Kara would say was that apparently Lena works out too with a private coach.

_Day 39._

Kara has taught herself to use her new keyboard. It’s faster, but still not fast enough for her.

_“Why can’t I type as fast as I think! It’s really annoying to have to wait for your fingers to catch up!”_

_Day 44. Kara volunteers._

Kara goes door-to-door collecting for the Corto Maltese fundraiser.

_Day 52. Attempted mugging._

Someone tried to mug Kara and Alex on their way to a movie. Kara didn’t look the slightest bit scared, she was certain Alex would handle it. She was right, of course. Still, Alex decided that Kara should learn some sort of self defense – she has forgotten everything she learned while training at the DEO.

_Day 55. Kara volunteers again._

Lena Luthor tells the world that she has created the Whole Life Foundation, a charitable foundation with the goal of helping people to improve their own lives. To start out, it’s will provide support to existing aid organizations.

Kara volunteers at two different crisis hotlines, but only practical stuff and being there for the people manning the phones – and she’s deeply impressed by those people. _“They are so smart, and wise, and they really, really help people!”_

_Day 68._

Kara is shaping up pretty well, the exercise is working. She figured out that she likes boxing as workout – as long as she doesn’t have to hit anybody. Which is probably a good thing, since being near-sighted in a boxing match is almost as big a handicap as wearing glasses.

_Day 92._

Kara gets her first front-page story covering the trial of Lillian Luthor. It’s scarily accurate on several points that haven’t been made public. Alex swears, repeatedly, that she didn’t leak any information to Kara, and she asks Kara if Lena Luthor is her source.

Kara just shakes her head and smiles. “You know a reporter never reveals their sources. But no, it wasn’t Lena. I did show the story to Lena before printing it, after all, it’s her mother, but I didn’t change anything – and she didn’t ask me to.”

_Day 109. Kara wants to learn Spanish._

“I think I’ve got the hang of French now. I’ll just have to keep practicing it. So, I thought Spanish would be a good next choice. Did you know they speak Spanish on Corto Maltese?”

_Day 121._

Kara is on her way to work when she sees a traffic accident happen. A pedestrian steps out from behind her bus and a car fails to stop in time. Mere yards away from her, a man dies in a completely preventable accident. It just feels so wrong that nobody stopped this. So wrong.

She gets off the bus and wants to help, but there’s already a ring of people around the accident and other people are trying to revive the poor man. The way he fell, she knows it’s futile. Instead she just walks the rest of the way to CatCo towers, slowly crying at the pointlessness.

_Day 124._

Supergirl saves eight people from a fire.


	6. The Return of Supergirl

“What have we got?” J’onn is at the end of the table again. It’s just him, Alex and Winn. 

It’s been two months since their last Supergirl-related meeting, and the DEO have had their hands full. Even if Mon-El has stepped up and helped them a lot, he’s still no Supergirl, so J’onn can’t help but feel a bit of hope. 

Winn pulls up a video. “This was recorded by a bystander, actually the one who first called 9-1-1, on his phone. You can see the fire spreading through the building and people in the upper floor windows. And … here Supergirl appears. The entire rescue takes 19 seconds, and she rescues four adults, four children and two cats. Then she flies through the building and extinguishes the fire with her frost breath, and here … she disappears.” He rewinds to a frame where Supergirl is dropping off a man and a woman. “This is the best image we have, and even on a phone camera, it’s pretty clear that this _is_  Supergirl, or someone made to look exactly like her. I still have the measurements I made for the costume, and the one in the video seems to match it exactly.”

“Danvers, any witness statements?”

“Only a few so far, but we are trying to set up interviews with as many witnesses as we can without raising too much suspicion – after all, seeing Supergirl isn’t usually a case for the FBI. The ones we have all agree that she looked like Supergirl and she acted like Supergirl. She spoke a little – she told the older kids not to worry while she flew down with the younger ones – and she sounded _completely normal_ , according to them all. They couldn’t really remember Supergirl’s voice, but they didn’t doubt for a moment that it was her. They all say she felt like any other person to the touch, very strong, but also very gentle.”

“Anything out of the ordinary that you can see?”

Alex thinks for a moment. “The only thing that isn’t Kara’s MO is that this Supergirl didn’t stick around. She would always have stayed to talk to the people, and wait for the fire department, in case they needed help with anything. This one was all business, the moment there wasn’t any danger left, she just disappeared.”

“We both say _disappear_ , and that’s what the witnesses say too,” Winn points out, “do we actually think she disappeared into thin air, or did she just leave at super-speed? The frame rate of the phone camera is so low that Supergirl could easily fly away between frames.”

Alex nods her head. “Good point. I don’t think she flew – usually when she does that, you feel or hear a movement of air, and nobody reported that, even when asked. It really did seem like she just popped out of existence. Could it be a hologram?”

“No. Holograms can’t carry people or freeze a burning house.” Winn scratches his head. “Teleport maybe? If such a thing exists. I couldn’t read any energy signatures afterward, but I wouldn’t really know what to look for, we don’t have any real teleportation technology in the archives, and all I have seen has been cross-dimensional travel.”

“You’re thinking she could be popping in from Barry-earth and going back again?” Alex raises an eyebrow.

“Actually, I wasn’t, but that is an idea. It’s better than anything I have.”

J’onn interrupts, “But it wasn’t Kara?”

Both Alex and Winn shake their heads. “Winn, pull up the surveillance of Kara at the same time.”

Winn brings up another video that shows Kara sitting at her CatCo desk. It runs for 30 seconds of Kara typing. Alex continues “I’ve looked at the entire day, and there is nothing out of the ordinary. A little later, when the Supergirl video hits the TV stations, Kara gets up and looks at the TV with everybody else, and she cheers just like everybody else. Unless she can be in two places at the same time, this Supergirl isn’t Kara.”

“And, as usual, we can’t even rule out that she can be in two places at the same time.” Winn throws up his hands in frustration. “I really wish we could know something, _anything_ , for sure!”

* * *

In the following weeks, Supergirl appears almost every day, sometimes more than once a day. She always appears, saves somebody’s life, and then disappears again as soon as the danger is over. In every case, Kara is minding her own business at the time.

One day Supergirl is fighting a chemical fire in the industrial area long enough for Alex to get there. Alex shouts and waves, trying to get Supergirl’s attention. Other people also show up, looking at the fire. Supergirl swoops down, hangs in the air in front of them and says “Please move back, this area isn’t safe.” Then she flies back and continues fighting the fire.

Alex is sure it is Kara’s voice and Kara’s face, but there was no sign of recognition, not even when Supergirl looked straight at her.

Alex makes people move further back, then she gets out her binoculars and starts examining Supergirl in detail. She definitely looks like Kara, but there is something about how she moves that doesn’t feel right. It’s too precise, too emotionless, almost like watching a clockwork. This Supergirl doesn’t _feel_  like Kara.

Again, Supergirl disappears when the job is done.

They call in Superman. He hangs around National City for a couple of days, but whenever there is an emergency, Supergirl doesn’t show up, and he handles it instead. Eventually, they give up on that idea, and Alex sends Superman home again. “Thanks for trying, but she only appears if there is danger, and apparently, she knows that there isn’t really danger with Superman around.” 

She has a feeling that Superman had _really_  hoped to see Supergirl again.

* * *

_Day 147. Supergirl saves Kara._

It is a completely random accident. Someone trips over a dog leash at a crowded bus stop, stumbles into someone else, and like dominos, people are pushed around, until finally the person waiting at the curb falls in front of the bus. That person is Kara Danvers, and all she manages to think is “Oh, crap!” as the bus comes towards her far too quickly. Then she is flying. Supergirl scoops her up and puts her down again on the sidewalk, just ten yards further down the street, looks around … and disappears.

When she has convinced everybody that she is OK, herself included, Kara phones Alex. “Alex, I just saw Supergirl!”

“Oh, you did? That’s cool. What did she look like?”

“Ah, I’m … not really sure. My glasses weren’t on straight, so I really only saw something blue, red and blonde. But she picked me up and put me down again. And saved me from being run over by a bus!”

“A … you … what? Are you OK?”

“I’m fine, Supergirl saved me! She’s sooooo cool!”

* * *

“Maybe she’s a mental projection from Kara’s subconscious?” Winn suggests, as his theory of the day. 

Alex doesn’t even look up when answering. “Nope. Supergirl helps people that Kara doesn’t even know is in danger yet. Unless Kara’s subconscious is also psychic.”

“It could be?” Winn proposes.

Alex sighs. “Anything is possible, apparently.” 


	7. The Breaking of the Spell

_Day 159._

This DEO assignment has gone decidedly pear-shaped. Alex is in an underground bunker, pinned down under heavy fire from some thorn shooting alien, the rest of her team blocked off by a collapsed tunnel. She’s been hit twice, in the leg and shoulder, and she really hope those thorns aren’t poisoned. She can’t see any way she’ll get out of this alive. She’s sorry that she won’t get more time with Maggie, but she’s horrified what losing her will do to Kara. Kara has already lost three parents, now she’s also lost her power and her memory of Krypton. She shouldn’t have to lose more.

That’s when Supergirl _appears_. She makes quick work of the alien. Heat vision cuts off the walkway he’s standing on, and he’s been wrapped in metal girders before he hits the floor, then he’s thrown into a dumpster and the lid welded shut. The entire maneuver took no more than eight seconds. Alex staggers out from her cover, favoring her bleeding leg. “K-Kara?” Her voice is wavering, maybe moving wasn’t such a good idea anyway. Supergirl looks at her. In all recent Supergirl sightings, she disappeared immediately when the job was done. This one stays and looks at Alex with a completely blank face. No recognition at all. But still here? Finally Alex realizes that maybe she’s not out of danger yet. Then she blacks out.

When she comes to, her teammates tell her that Supergirl had flown right through the collapsed tunnel, burning a way through with her heat vision while carrying Alex. When she reached the team on the other side, she didn’t say anything, but seemed reluctant to let Alex go until agent Vasquez had grabbed Supergirl by the shoulders and shouted to let her help Alex. Supergirl had put Alex down very gently, and just stood there looking while Vasquez administered first aid. Only when Alex started to stir and Vasquez said “She’s OK”, they heard Supergirl breathe for the first time. Then she disappeared. Seconds later Alex’s phone rings in the pocket of her jacket back in the DEO locker room. 

That causes a pop-up on Winn’s screen. He is sitting in mission control, and everyone there is following the feed from the away team. “Director Henshaw! Kara is calling Alex.” It was Alex who had insisted that they should still check when Kara called her, because that’s what she would do if she was ever in trouble.

“Any idea why?” J’onn moves over to look at the screen. Winn types a quick key sequence and shows a fast-forward movie of the last fifteen minutes of Kara sitting at her CatCo desk, just working. Then she startles and grabs her phone to call Alex.

“Reroute the call to me, and then sync up the video with the away team feed. I want to know exactly when she reacts.”

J’onn answers the phone the moment it rings, and doesn’t even get it to his ear before Kara speaks. “… OK, Alex? I know you say I shouldn’t call you at work, but I just had the most awful feeling that something’s wrong! Alex?”

“I’m sorry miss Danvers, but Agent Danvers is currently on assignment and cannot come to the phone. Can I help you?” J’onn keeps his voice as neutral as possible.

“I just want to know if Alex is safe! She’s not, is she? I knew it! What happened? Where is she?”

“Easy now, miss Danvers. Why do you think anything happened to your sister?”

“I just know it. I can _feel_  it, like a gnawing hole in my chest. I know it’s Alex. Where _is_ she?”

J'onn looks to the monitor where Alex is sitting up, and Agent Vasquez is giving her something to drink. “Just a moment miss Danvers, let me check.” He puts the phone on hold and turns back to Winn, who has videos of Supergirl and Kara running side by side. “Do you have a match?”

“It’s when she breathes.” Winn points to the screen. “If you look closely, you can see Supergirl and Kara both take a deep breath at exactly the same time. Then Supergirl disappears and Kara starts panicking. Some coincidence, eh?”

“Right. OK, let’s bring her in.” He toggles the phone back on and speaks gently to Kara. “Miss Danvers, sorry to keep you waiting. Your sister has indeed been hurt, but not badly. I’m sure she’ll be happy to have you there when the doctor is done seeing to her. If you tell me where you are, I’ll get someone to pick you up… CatCo towers, OK, in ten minutes … yes, the parking garage is fine. … Thank you for calling.”

J’onn turns to Winn again. “Agent Schott, take a civilian car, pick up miss Danvers, you’ll get directions en route. Agent Vasquez, prepare to evac agent Danvers, I want her in medical in 10 minutes. Agent Donovan, get a med-evac running for agent Danvers ASAP.” Winn was waving his hand to get attention, not very successfully. “Yes, agent Schott?” 

“Why me? I’m not even a good driver.”

“No, but you know _Kara Danvers_  better than anyone else here, and she knows and trusts you. So you pick her up, act friendly, and notice _everything_  out of the ordinary. I want a full report when you’re back. Now GO!”

Winn doesn’t notice anything out of the ordinary for a completely flustered and scared Kara. She doesn’t stop talking for one moment, and all he can do is to concentrate on driving and repeating that Alex will be fine.

Kara paces while waiting for the doctor to let her in. When Dr. Hamilton opens the door and starts speaking, she’s past her by “You can …”, running into the room where Alex is lying, and she throws herself at the bed. “Whoa, easy sis. I’ll be fine!”

“What happened? Oh, Alex, I just felt like I was about to lose you!”

“It was just somebody resisting arrest. I got cut and lost some blood, and I will need stitches when they remove the bandage, but it’s not that bad.”

“Well, it _felt_  bad to me!” It does calm down Kara to see Alex being so clear and calm. She’d feared that Alex would be unconscious, broken and bleeding, and she didn’t know how she would have reacted to that.

Alex spots Winn through the door. “I’ll be fine. Go keep Winn company while I get stitched up, for some reason they won’t let me do it myself, even though I’m better at it than everybody else here.”

“ _Sure_  you are.” Dr. Hamilton is back. “But she’s right, I won’t let her do it herself, so I’ll be taking over again.”

Kara starts to move away, slowly, keeping Alex’s hand in hers until their arms become too short. “Be safe, Alex!”

In the waiting room, Kara finally feels the last of the panic leave her, and she promptly breaks down crying. “I really … felt like … I lost her!” 

Winn tries his best to console her.

* * *

A magical spell is a complex entity. In some ways, it is as if it is alive and aware. It has one job, to make the world the way its creator wanted it. To enforce the will of the sorceress onto the world.

It made Kara be a physically normal, average human and not Supergirl, which wasn’t easy at all. And it requires something to keep that up.

If Circe had still been around, the power of her will would be enough to sustain the spell as long as she wanted. But she’s long gone to search other worlds for her enemy.

If everybody believed the spell to be the truth, it would eventually become the truth, empowered by those beliefs. But Kara is always surrounded by people who disbelieve the spell and want it to fail.

Its only anchor, its only source of power, is really Kara’s own wish to be normal. And Circe is very good at weaving spells, so that could have been enough, if only Kara would have accepted a world without Supergirl. But she couldn’t, it just felt too wrong, and _wrong_  is exactly the opposite of what the spell needs.

So it had to compromise, something had to give. Now Kara is still normal and not Supergirl, but to avoid Kara fighting against the spell, it had to make Supergirl exist anyway. One could argue that it’s not technically against its core purpose, but “technically” doesn’t matter. It did compromise on the one thing it exists to do, and it is fraying at the edges because of that. 

To the spell, the _real_  Kara-and-Supergirl still exists. That is what it draws on to create the Kara and the Supergirl. If it had been really successful, the Kara would have taken over and the Kara-and-Supergirl would be forgotten. So today, it drew on Kara-and-Supergirl to create and guide the Supergirl. Only, at the end, something failed – it couldn’t keep the Kara and the Supergirl separate. When it comes to worrying about Alex Danvers, there is no difference between Kara and Supergirl. The spell failed, again. It is no longer just fraying, it’s unraveling. Still, it soldiers on, it has no other reason to exist than to ensure that Kara Danvers is human and not Supergirl.

* * *

That evening, Alex is released on the condition that someone keeps her under constant observation. Alex had made sure Maggie was there to volunteer, and to drive them all home to Alex’s apartment. J’onn had been by earlier to show the videos to Alex, and they decided to take a chance, crossing their fingers that this development was a good sign. Maggie puts down the folder they had prepared.

“Thanks for the ride, Maggie. I’ll leave you two to be alone.” Kara begins to leave again, but Alex stops her.

“Please stay, Kara, there’s something I’d like to show you.”

“Oh, what?”

“Come sit here, I’ll tell you something about Supergirl.”

“Oooh, cool!”

And Alex shows pictures of Supergirl in action, of Supergirl’s pod, of herself and Supergirl – from DEO security cameras – and starts to tell Kara about Supergirl’s origin.

“Everybody know that,” Kara objects, “she’s from Krypton, just like Superman.”

“Sure, but do you know her parent’s names?”

“No.”

“They were Zor-El and Alura, of the house of El. Zor-El was the brother of Jor-El, father of Kal-El, who is Superman.”

“You’re messing with me.” Kara looks cross. “Alura is _my_  mother’s name! That’s not funny!”

“I’m not trying to be funny, here, I have a recording of Supergirl saying these things.”

Alex pulls up a laptop and starts a video. It was from when Supergirl was officially accepted as part of the DEO, a standard security clearance interview. Supergirl is looking into the camera while speaking. “I am Kara Zor-El, daughter of Zor-El and Alura In-Ze. I was born in the city of Argo on Krypton. I am 24 earth years old and of sound mind.” Alex stops the video.

“That’s … _not funny!_  Why are you doing this? Why is Supergirl mocking me too? _I_  am Kara Sorell from Argo, not her!”

Alex puts a hand on Kara’s shoulder and looks at her. “I’m not mocking you, Kara, neither is Supergirl. This recording is more than a year old. I’m showing you this because _you are_  Supergirl, Kara, you have just forgotten it. Look at her, how she looks. She looks exactly like you. Same face, same earrings, even the same voice.”

“ _THAT’S NOT TRUE!_  I don’t look _anything_  like her.” Kara could see similarities, like being blonde, but that’s not how she sees herself at all. OK, the earrings maybe. And the eyebrows, but still.

Alex keeps speaking in a gentle, loving voice. “ _Please_  remember, Kara. We all love you, and we want you to remember who you really are.” 

“But _I am Kara_ , not Supergirl. I _like_ being Kara! I don’t want to be super like you. Stop being so _mean_!” She is standing up now, and she pushes Alex away and runs, throwing the door open on the way.

“You let her go?” Alex looks at Maggie.

Maggie nods. “I don’t think pushing her more would do any good right now, she has to process it herself, and that either works or it doesn’t. Or maybe Lena can get through to her.”

“Lena?”

“Be a detective, Danvers. Her sister and best friend has just been mean to her for no apparent reason, where will she go?”

“… to her next-best friend, Lena Luthor?”

“Right in one.” Maggie smiles. “Or maybe to her mother, but Lena is closer.”

“But, she’ll tell Lena Luthor that I think she’s Supergirl. Did you know this would happen?”

“It was on a short list of possible outcomes.”

“Aren’t you worried? She’s Lena Luthor!”

Maggie puts her arms around Alex. “I guess we'll just have to trust Kara's judgment. And it was inevitable, anyway.”

“What was?”

“Lena finding out. She’s been hanging out with Kara for months. She’s a certified genius. Either Kara never gets her powers back, and then it doesn’t matter, or she does, and then there is absolutely no chance Lena won’t find out, most likely because Kara will tell her. And that’s if she doesn’t know already.”

“Are you always this smart, Sawyer?”

“Yep, that’s why you love me.”


	8. Was it really that Simple?

Kara runs all the way to Lena’s apartment and quickly enters her private code for the penthouse elevator. 

Lena didn't expect Kara today, so when the security system notifies her that Kara is in the elevator, she checks the security camera. Kara is wiping her eyes and blowing her nose, so something is obviously up. She's waiting for Kara when the doors open.

“Come in Kara, let me …”

That’s how far Lena got before Kara wrapped herself around her neck and started crying again.

“There, there.” Lena just lets her cry, and soon enough, Kara starts to explain herself as well as her sniffling allows. 

“Alex … was mean! … and I don’t know why! … why?”

“Kara, if you use the bathroom over there to wipe your eyes and nose, then I’ll make hot chocolate. Then we’ll talk. Is that OK?”

Kara nods vigorously, and Lena gives her a gentle push towards the bathroom. She’s _so_  not accustomed to situations like this, so she’s basically running “what would Kara do” simulations in her head. Let her cry. Make her comfortable. Then ask what the problem is. At least Kara had taught her how to make hot chocolate on this monstrously expensive espresso machine that she never used anyway.

Lena puts down a tray with two cups of chocolate just as Kara enters the living room. She looks better now, or at least more collected. “Come here, Kara, and tell me what happened.”

Kara sits down and sips the chocolate, which at least is rewarded with a sad smile.

“It’s Alex. I don’t know what’s gotten into her. She showed me pictures of Supergirl and told me about her, and then suddenly she started claiming that _I_  was Supergirl, and I had just forgotten. That’s ridiculous! But she insisted, and Maggie was there and she didn’t say anything, and then she started claiming that my real mother wasn’t my real mother, because I was from Krypton, and that’s just _mean_.”

“So Alex thinks you are really Supergirl?”

“No she doesn’t, it’s just something she says. I mean, she has met Supergirl and everything. Supergirl even saved her _today_ , and that wasn’t me, I was at work. And I don’t look like Supergirl.”

Kara takes off her glasses, removes the band holding her hair in a pony tail, and shakes her head to make her hair fall down. “I mean, do I _look_  like Supergirl?”

Lena bites back her immediate reaction - a sarcastic “No, you just look like her identical twin” - and goes for the diplomatic “I can see what you mean.”

Her thoughts are all over the place. Sure, she had suspected that Kara might be Supergirl, but when Supergirl disappeared and Kara was still here, she had put that idea on ice. And when Supergirl started appearing again, even once when Kara was at her place, it seemed impossible. But Alex Danvers knows things, and she would know that too, so if she insists, then … why would she do that? Random meanness doesn’t fit. Could she be right? That Kara really is Supergirl and has forgotten? But why suddenly start pushing her today? Supergirl was gone for months, and has been back for weeks, why today? And what made Supergirl forget? And what does this mean for her friendship with Kara? Strike that, not relevant. _Yes it is!_  She can almost hear Kara’s voice saying that. OK, it’s important too. She needs something more to go on.

“I don’t know Alex as well as you do, but from what you have said, she doesn’t seem like someone who is just mean. Maybe she really thinks you are Supergirl. Do you have any idea why she thought that today? Or why she would _want_  you to be Supergirl?”

Kara puts her glasses back on and thinks. It makes sense – Alex isn’t mean, she almost never is, and only when she’s angry and drunk. She didn’t seem angry, or drunk. So maybe Alex really believes her silly idea.

“I don’t know. She was wounded today, badly I think, worse than she lets on, and I just knew it. I could feel the fear of losing her. And they say Supergirl was there and saved her. And even though I was somewhere else, they probably think that I had some sort of … connection to Supergirl.”

 _A chink in the armor, attack their weaknesses._  Lena can see why they picked today. They had hoped that they could get through to her. “But what did Alex want from you?”

“She wanted me to remember that I am Supergirl, which is, again, ridiculous, since I’m not. I think I would remember that! And Supergirl saved _me_  once! And I don’t even _want_ to be Supergirl!”

“You don’t? I thought everybody wanted to be Supergirl. I know I do from time to time.”

“No! I don’t. I just want to be a normal person like everybody else. I want Alex to have a normal sister. I want you to have a normal friend. Being Supergirl would just complicate everything.”

 _Bingo_. _You cannot reason someone out of something they weren’t reasoned into_. Kara doesn’t want to be convinced that she’s Supergirl. That’s negotiation 101, you need to offer something that the other part wants, or make the other part want what you are offering. So, assume that Alex is right, and that today is the best day to strike, what can I offer Kara?

“I can see that, Kara. But don’t worry, I don’t think of you as a normal friend, I think of you as an amazing friend.”

“Aw, thanks!”

“But think of what you could do with Supergirl’s powers. I’m sure being Supergirl is complicated, but what if you just had her powers, just being Super Kara, what would you do?”

“Oh … Fly a lot? That sounds fun. And I could help people! I’d just fly in, too fast to see, and save people. Then nobody would need to know it was me. Saved by the Super-dunnowhat. That’d make a great headline.” Kara laughs.

“Why do you think Supergirl does what she does?”

“Oh, I guess she wants to help people too. I think …”

And that’s where the spell finally has to capitulate. Kara trying to think _like_ Supergirl is just too close to Kara thinking _as_ Supergirl, and keeping the two apart becomes too much for the already strained remains of the spell. Like a string pulled beyond capacity, the spell snaps and reality comes rushing back.

Kara groans and grabs her head.

“Kara? Kara! Are you OK?”

She takes off her glasses and rubs her eyes. The world is full of sounds, but Lena is sitting right here. Kara focuses on her face. “I’m OK.”

Lena waits.

“Really, I’m OK.”

She looks into those kind green eyes, those _knowing_  green eyes, and sighs. 

“How did you know what to say?”

Lena makes a self-deprecating smile. “It wasn’t that difficult, you gave me all the clues. There had to be something you wanted more than being normal, otherwise you would never have become Supergirl. And I looked at myself – I’m a Luthor, which is somewhere between a liability and a curse. There are many days where I wish I could just be normal. So why don’t I? I’m sure I could disappear if I really wanted to, that’s just a matter of money and connections. So what keeps me going anyway?”

“You want to help people?”

“Exactly. I would give up all this in a heartbeat if I thought I could help people better in any other way. But I can’t. _Noblesse oblige_. And yet, Kara, you have inspired me again and again. There is no way you would not want to help people.”

The spell had fought valiantly. Alex's words had cut deep and forced it to latch onto the core of Kara’s desire to be normal, to emphasize that as its last defense. When Kara realized that she, and Supergirl, wanted to help people _more_  than she, and Supergirl, wanted to be normal, the final distinction between Kara and Supergirl, the only anchor the spell had left, was gone. 

“So, what happens now? With us?” Kara looks down.

“How much do you remember? Of the last many months?”

“… everything. I remember every moment of being Kara. And everything Supergirl did. I even remember saving, and being saved by, myself – at the same time.” A weak smile. “That’s really weird.”

“I know you said that you want me to have a normal friend, but that’s never going to happen. Face it, you have to be extraordinary just to want to be friend with a Luthor. And you have always been extraordinary, in so many ways. So all I need to ask is: Was any of the things you told me lies? Are you not really the Kara I know?”

Kara looks up, directly into the waiting eyes of Lena. “I am that Kara. The only thing I have said that isn’t true is what happened before I was adopted. I didn’t lose my parents in a car explosion. I lost them when my planet exploded, … and I did see it happen.” She can feel tears well up at the thought. “But everything after that has been the truth, … just not the whole truth.”

“And Kara Sorell?”

“Kara Zor-El of Krypton … lost her parents and family, was adopted and grew up to be Kara Danvers. It wasn't Kara Zor-El who became Supergirl, it was Kara Zor-El Danvers, because she … because _I_  wanted to help people. You were right about that.” She smiles. “Kara Danvers isn't a ‘secret identity’ that I use to hide that I really am Supergirl—I dress up as Supergirl to hide that I'm really Kara, to protect the people in my _real_ life.”

Kara looks down again. “The Kara you have seen is the real me, a me who didn’t have to lie and pretend around everybody … I will miss that.”

Now Lena is smiling broadly. “Then don’t stop!”

“What?”

“I’m sure you don’t pretend around Alex or Eliza, or at least not about _that_. They know who you are, so you can just be yourself. I know too now, and I would hate to lose my friend Kara.”

“But … there’ll be things I can’t talk about, …  because as Supergirl, I know things, other secrets too …”

“Kara, you are a reporter. There were already things you couldn’t say, sources you couldn’t reveal. I was OK with that, and I'm OK with this too. You know there are also things that I can’t tell you, that’s just part of being adult – well, and being CEO of a major company! I’m sure we can figure it out. I know I want to.” She takes Kara’s hand. “Friends?”

“But … I’m Supergirl … doesn’t that change anything?”

“I’m sure it does, but I sure hope it’s nothing important. Someone once gave me a brilliant advice … You _are_ human, Kara, in so many ways, never forget or deny that. Don’t make the Super more important than the girl.”

“Thank you.” Kara wipes her eyes with her free hand. “Still friends! Definitely!”

* * *

There is a knock on Alex Danvers’ door. Maggie has to stop Alex from jumping up and running to open it. “Sit! No quick movements, you know the doctor’s orders!”

Maggie checks the spyhole and opens the door. “Hi Kara, I almost didn’t recognize you without your glasses. Come in.”

Alex is standing, favoring her wounded leg, and she immediately starts apologizing. “Kara! I’m so sorry I was mean to you. Please forgive me!” She takes a step towards the door, but her leg buckles below her and she starts to fall. Then Kara is holding her and easing her back onto the couch. “There is nothing to forgive, Alex, and I thank you,” she gives Alex a kiss on the forehead, “for never giving up on me.”

“You are back?” Kara can hear the hope in Alex’s voice.

Kara nods. “I’m back.”

“And you remember … “

“I remember everything that happened as Kara, but I’m sure you have a lot more to tell about it too. I want to hear it all – tomorrow. Then I’ll also do all the check-ups that the DEO will surely want. But tonight, I’ll just be flying. I just didn’t want you to feel sorry all night.”

“Thanks, Kara. I won’t tell anyone yet. And your glasses are in the top drawer over there.”

“Thanks … Ah, yes, I’ve missed those glasses.” She puts them on. “You can tell mom … no, wait, I think I’ll just go tell her myself.”

“Say hi from me, Kara, and fly safely!”

  


Alex smiles. Maggie sits down besides her and takes her hand. “Good to see you smile, Alex. I was at my wits end before, nothing I said would cheer you up.”

“I was that bad?”

“When you thought you had hurt Kara? Yes, that bad. At least now you won’t have to worry about her safety any more.”

“Oh, I’ll always worry. Heck, it’s practically my job description!”

“Well, then at least for tonight, you’re off duty.” Maggie squeezes Alex’s hand.

“That I am. That I am.”


End file.
